Reality

“There is no reality except the one contained within us. That is why so many people live such an unreal life. They take the images outside them for reality and never allow the world within to assert itself.”
-Hermann Hesse

What is “real?” Something we can see with our eyes, feel with our hands? What “makes” something real? With virtual reality and reality-TV, these are tough questions these days!

Relationships

“Intimate relationships cannot substitute for a life plan. But to have any meaning or viability at all, a life plan must include intimate relationships.”
-Harriet Lerner, Dance of Intimacy (1989)

This week we’re looking at relationships. Interestingly enough, all the great quotes I found on this subject were from women! And most of the books that I have didn’t have much, if anything, under that heading. Is this a new thing, to study relationships? Are relationships more important to us now than they have been in the past?

The purpose of relationships, like just about anything in this life, is for us to learn more about ourselves and who we really are. That is why intimate relationships teach us so much. When we truly open ourselves up and express our feelings we feel closer to God. We become aware of our own vulnerability, and our own divinity.
-Lissa Coffey

Remembrance

“The world does not require so much to be informed as reminded.”
-Hannah More (1745-1833) English author

This week our topic is remembrance. We all remember where we were when we got the devastating news last year on September 11th. It was such a shock, such a tragedy that affected each of us in some way. Major events jolt our senses into total present moment awareness and the images become ingrained in our memories. Do we remember where we were, or what we were doing, just two uneventful days before that on September 9th? I couldn’t tell you what I was doing. It was probably just another day. But those are exactly the kinds of days that we want to, and really need to remember – when things are good, and life is peaceful.
-Lissa Coffey

Renewal

“ The natural healing force in each one of us is the greatest force in getting well.”
-Hippocrates

Spring has sprung! Doesn’t it feel great? This is a time of rejuvenation and renewal. A new cycle has started. Just as we can shed our winter coats, we can slough off our negativity, wash away our old attitudes, and begin again. Our lives will reflect our new outlook, bright and clear!
-Lissa Coffey

Resolution

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing."
-Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)

It's that time again. New Year's Eve, time to make our resolutions. It's tradition. It's one way to keep ourselves on track. Yet how long do we go before letting those resolutions fall by the wayside? Do we even remember what we resolved to accomplish last year at this time? We can choose to do it differently this time. Keeping in mind that we can change or add to our goals at any time, (since every month is a New Month, every week a New Week and every day a NEW DAY!) let's look at this time as a chance to strengthen our resolve! Go for it!
Happy New Year!
-Lissa Coffey

Reality

“Nothing which is at all times and in every way agreeable to us can have objective reality. It is of the very nature of the real that it should have sharp corners and rough edges, that it should be resistant, should be itself. Dream-furniture is the only kind on which you never stub your toes or bang your knee.”
-C.S. Lewis

We’ve often heard the phrase “harsh reality.” As if reality can smack us in the face. But that smack could just be a wake-up call to alert us to the bigger “reality.” When we stub a toe, we’re brought immediately to the present moment! Living in present-moment awareness we can more clearly see what is real and what is not, what is important and what is dispensable.
-Lissa Coffey

Reality

“All our interior world is reality – and that perhaps more so than our apparent world.”
-Marc Chagall

Love, joy, bliss, peace – we experience all this in our interior world, yet we cannot draw a picture or take a photo of exactly what it looks like. Our interior world is so vast, so filled with amazing gifts. Yet where do we place our attention? We’re busy trying to make our apparent world, our exterior world, look good. When we look within, we find the abundance that we so desperately seek. It is there all the time!
-Lissa Coffey

Reality

“ Reality has changed chameleonlike before my eyes so many times that I have learned, or am learning, to trust almost anything except what appears to be so.”
-Maya Angelou

Appearances change. Nothing in this exterior world stays the same. Have you ever gone to visit a place, only to return several years later and not even recognize it? Buildings go up and down, tenants move in and out, trees grow, signs change. People change, too. We all start out as babies, and our features mature as we age. Our hairstyles and clothes change with the trends. But what stays the same? Spirit. We can trust that love never goes out of style, and never moves away.
-Lissa Coffey

Reality

“We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality.”
-Iris Murdoch

Have you ever been to Disneyworld? It’s a beautiful place – colorful, clean, fun, and full of surprises! And when we’re there, we know that it is all illusion – that it is all there for our enjoyment. We experience the rides as entertainment, even the scary roller-coasters. Yet when we’re in our own “world” we tend to take things so seriously. What would happen if we approached life as our own amusement park? Knowing that one ride takes us for a spin and another shakes us up and another lets us sit back and relax? What a concept! Then we could stop looking for reality all around us and start finding it inside of us.
-Lissa Coffey

Relationships

“Union is only possible to those who are units. To be fit for relations in time, souls, whether of man or woman, must be able to do without them in the spirit.”
-Margaret Fuller, Women in the Nineteenth Century (1845)

We are each whole, complete, and perfect just as we are. None of us needs another person to be fulfilled. There is no “other half” that needs to be found. Our primary relationship is with ourselves. And we can choose to share our selves, because we know what an unlimited supply of love is available to us! We learn and grow and give and receive from our relationships – and that is beautiful.
-Lissa Coffey

Relationships

“Seven years would be insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other, and seven days are more than enough for others.”
-Jane Austen, Sense and Sensibility (1811)

There are some people we just “click” with. Maybe it’s love at first sight, maybe it’s some kind of karmic recognition. But when this happens, it is usually a sign to pay attention – that this is an important relationship. We are here for each other. There is so much for us to accomplish together here in this space and time, and we are brought together to do just that.
-Lissa Coffey

Relationships

“The biggest mistake is believing there is one right way to listen, to talk, to have a conversation – or a relationship.”
-Deborah Tannen

A relationship is a living thing. It grows, evolves, and no two are the same. We need to care for our relationships, and that can mean different things in different circumstances. We need to pay attention to relationships that are important to us, and know that in return the relationship nurtures us.
-Lissa Coffey

Relationships

“ The long-term accommodation that protects marriage and other such relationships is… forgetfulness.”
-Alice Walker, You Can’t Keep a Good Woman Down (1981)

“Forgetfulness” goes beyond forgiveness. First you forgive, then you forget. This is present-moment awareness in action! The past is history – it’s gone, and it can certainly be forgotten. As we grow and change, as our relationships grow and change, forgetfulness can be a welcome accommodation!
-Lissa Coffey

Remembrance

“How can such deep-imprinted images sleep in us at times, till a word, a sound, awake them?”
-Gotthold E. Lessing (1729-1781) German dramatist

Last year, the images of 9/11 were vividly presented to us on television – so much so that we couldn’t get them out of our minds. We were consumed with information, and watched with tear-filled eyes and we tried to make sense of it all. Now some time has passed, and we’re starting to feel normal again. But this anniversary has brought up a lot of the same sadness and questions that we experienced one year ago. It is important for us to take time for reverence and remembrance, to acknowledge the events that took place and the far-reaching impact on our lives. And then, as time goes on, it is important for us to move on, too – knowing that the memories remain, there for us to call upon and reflect upon at the appropriate times.
-Lissa Coffey

Remembrance

“The joys I have possessed are ever mine; out of thy reach, behind eternity, hid in the sacred treasure of the past, but blest remembrance brings them hourly back.”
-John Dryden (1631-1700) English poet and author

We remember our sorrow because we felt it so deeply. It is also important to remember our joy. Think back to a time when you felt truly joyful… maybe when you first fell in love? When your child was born? When you accomplished an important goal? Life is filled with these joyful moments, and they are there for us to enjoy not just once, but many times over through our memories.
-Lissa Coffey

Remembrance

“The joys I have possessed are ever mine; out of thy reach, behind eternity, hid in the sacred treasure of the past, but blest remembrance brings them hourly back.”
-John Dryden (1631-1700) English poet and author

We remember our sorrow because we felt it so deeply. It is also important to remember our joy. Think back to a time when you felt truly joyful… maybe when you first fell in love? When your child was born? When you accomplished an important goal? Life is filled with these joyful moments, and they are there for us to enjoy not just once, but many times over through our memories.
-Lissa Coffey

Remembrance

“ How we remember, what we remember, and why we remember form the most personal map of our individuality.”
Christina Baldwin (1977)

Our memories make up a big part of who we are. They help to shape us. We carry our memories with us wherever we go, and we share them with people who want to know us. We can cherish our memories, even the sad ones, because they are ours.
-Lissa Coffey

Renewal

“You could not step twice into the same river; for other waters are ever flowing on to you.”
-Heraclitus

Here on earth, in this physical realm, life is constantly changing. And as people, we are changing and growing and living and learning all the time. This is why we are here! Embrace change, step boldly into the unknown, this is a journey of discovery and self-discovery.
-Lissa Coffey

Renewal

“Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.”
-Psalm 51:10

Spirit is all-loving, all-encompassing, unbounded, immortal and invisible. And this wonderful energy is available to each one of us, within each one of us! Is it any wonder that we are powerful, beautiful and creative beings? Know it… and enjoy it!
-Lissa Coffey

Renewal

“Whatever the mind holds to and firmly believes in, forms a new pattern of thought within its creative mold, as whatever thought is held in the mind tends to take outward form in new creations.”
-Ernest Holmes

Who do you think you are? Depending on the tone of the person asking that question, you could choose to be insulted or intrigued. But really, do you know who you are? Are who you know yourself to be and who you think yourself to be the same person? We each create the lives we lead, and we’re doing this all the time with our thoughts and our actions. Think about it.
-Lissa Coffey

Renewal

“The house of the Divine is not closed to any who knock sincerely at its gates, whatever their past stumbles and errors.”
-Sri Aurobindo

Spirit is always within us and all around us, it can’t go away. There is nothing that we could possibly do to make it go away! We don’t have to knock, we don’t have to call, we don’t have to call out – it is already HERE! Welcome it, love it, use it, appreciate it.
-Lissa Coffey

Resolution

"Resolve, and thou art free."
-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882)

Our resolutions carry power! We can do anything we set our mind to. Ask yourself: do I mean it? Do I want it? Am I committed to taking action to accomplish this? If the answers are "yes" then make that resolution! It's as good as done.
-Lissa Coffey

Resolution

"Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve."
-Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)

A resolution is a commitment - it's a commitment to ourselves to grow, change, achieve, accomplish. We can make that commitment to ourselves this new year, and we can honor that commitment as time goes on and obstacles are thrown onto our paths. It all starts right here, right now.
-Lissa Coffey

Resolution

"Paths clear before those who know where they're going and are determined to get there."
-Anonymous

Once we set our minds on something, we make our resolution, then we can just let it go and watch the universe handle all the details. Things just seem to fall into place when we are aware enough to notice. Situations and circumstances orchestrate into one big conspiracy to fulfill our desires, and put us into a position where we can take action. We just need to keep our destination in mind, we don't need to control what happens every step of the way. We will get there.
-Lissa Coffey

Resolution

"He who is firm and resolute in will moulds the world to himself."
-Goethe

We are blessed with choice, with free will. We are not puppets at the disposal of the planets, but strong, intelligent creatures who are here to learn and grow through our experiences. The more we grow, the more we understand that we are creating our lives every minute of every day. Through our resolve, our will, our intentions, our decisions, we are making and changing our experiences all the time.
-Lissa Coffey

Simplicity

“Our life is frittered away by detail… Simplify, simplify, simplify.”
-Henry David Thoreau, Walden

How many ways can we say this, or hear this? “Don’t sweat the small stuff,” “Look at the big picture,” “All’s well that ends well.” The beauty of Japanese art is in its simplicity. Artists know that the empty spaces are just as important as the brush strokes. So much can be expressed with just a few lines. Musicians understand that just a few notes can convey an emotion, they don’t need a whole symphony every time. And poets need just a few words, not an entire textbook. Is there anything more beautiful than “I love you?” Life can be simple, sweet and oh, so beautiful, if we just allow it to be.
-Lissa Coffey