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heartbroken 25

Question

hi.i need your advice.pls help.i need some.i was dating dis guy from last 2 yrs… he was my first boyfreind.i was madly in love with him.i m 22.he recently went to london in holidays.we used to chat on whatsapp once in a while.one day i just cracked his acebook password nd read his messages.he was having an affair with another gal frm another city frm last 3 months.i nvr expected i ll evr face dat kind of problem bcoz i thought evn he loved me truly.bt…. he evn met him couple of times by goin to anothr city.wen i confronted him he said he is sorry if he hurted me bt he loves him.like i just felt he erased my memories completly.i nr evr looked at another guy also other den him.nd he said dat.i cried. i tried to hate him bt i cant.i still do love him.i just want him back.how can i do dat.i hav nt met him post break up.i talked on phne to him abt dis nd said i still love him to which he responded he wants us to b just frnds.bt after all dis dat we hav been frm last 2 yrs hw can i behave as frnd wen wat i mean is love.so pls help in nyway if i cn get him bck.pls.u cn save me.pls.i beg of u.thanx

Answer

I’m sorry things worked out that way for you.  This is what happens in online relationships.  We are removed from these people, we think we know someone but we really don’t.  You need to understand that you thought you were in love, but that wasn’t real love.  Real love takes time, and intimacy – and you can only get that when you really know a person.  Something in your was suspicious of this guy, because you hacked into his facebook account – so you didn’t trust him!  And you proved to him that you can’t be trusted, either.  This is not a good foundation for any relationship.

I say move on.  Find a real guy, who you can REALLY date – actually spend time having dinner with and hanging out with – not online, but in person.   Develop a real relationship, in the real world.  Start by being friends, getting to know each other, and each other’s friends and families. 

 

Good luck!

Love,

Lissa